Friday, September 23, 2005

Hey, you! Yes, you! You can be a better boyfriend.

How?

Well, it's easy! Get a job!

It doesn't matter what job it is, really. As long as you can do it and you are somewhat content there for the hours you have to be there for. Whatever it is, get there and show up regularly, and on time. Keep going back. Collect paycheck. Be sure to then cash paycheck. Use money to take care of life expenses, save the rest. Don't spend it on fancy music playing devices, or magnets from Urban Outfitters.

About once a week, take anywhere from $10 to $100, depending on the job you got, and spend it on you and your girlfriend doing something together. If you're poor, buy a nice bag of sour green apples, the big juicy ones, and take her to the scenic overlook in the midst of the Williamsburg Bridge to eat them. If you're rich, take her to Supper on Ave. A and 2nd and treat her to a fancy feast.

Do this for about two years. If you still like her, ask her to marry you.

Nice work!

3 Comments:

Anonymous L'Uncle Phreddie said...

LadyLove--you seem to be writing advice for Losers, guys who, no matter what the advice, will go do the very things you think so wrong to do...perhaps you ought to be more selective in the sort of guy you have in mind for a boyfriend.

1:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You seem to be a filthy whore. I can tell by the twelve $5 bracelets you wear.

The world need less of you.

4:32 PM  
Blogger Obbop said...

Male works while lazy woman stares at TV growing ever-fatter.

One method of estimating the emotional maturity of a female is when she realizes that just because a male is civil to her, such as smiling or saying "good morning" that male does not necessarilly have any desire to take her to bed or initiate any type of relationship.

Sadly, too many females, especially American females, never escape their adolescent attitudes.

2:50 PM  

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